Monday, January 4, 2010

The Yoga Superstars (and me)

Let me preface this entry with a Body Project Update:
All three of you might remember that I attempted to ease my neurological and muscular pain disorder by experimenting with a few gifts from BIG PHARMA. I wanted to see if I could break the pain cycle and help my body eventually heal itself. I took Lyrica and Cymbalta for about 6 months, and felt like a drug addict thanks to a multitude of side effects, but I was pain free for the most part. The RSD/CRPS symptoms in my left leg were still in full swing, but my other limbs, back, neck, and face felt fabulous.

Then I went off all of the drugs. It was awful. The HORRENDOUS withdrawal process followed by the WORSE THAN EVER pain flare made me feel like a fantastic failure.

But after about three months, it dawned on me that I was feeling better. I realized that it had been more than two weeks since I needed to take 1-3 baths everyday to cope with pain. I noticed that my energy level was creeping back up. Everyone, pain disorder or not, has bad days and I am no exception. I don't feel great everyday, but I have many, many, more good days than bad. I have been treating this tiny remission very gently, terrified that if I got crazy and walked too far (like, say, from one side of the grocery store to the other) that an unstoppable pain cycle would start all over again.

Then I went to Yoga. I was (am!) sore-- don't get me wrong. But it used too be that my sore muscles would aggravate my nerves, which would cause a burning so intense I couldn't tolerate my clothes. IT DIDN'T HAPPEN THIS TIME!!! Can you tell that I'm a little excited?

I even went back to yoga tonight. I was late, and got sandwiched between Yoga Goddesses 1 and 2 with their headstands and adept Flipping the Dog. At one point my right arm was shaking so violently under the strain of my 97th inverted pose that I had to hold it still with my other hand. But I was there. I finished the class, and I felt amazing.

Namaste.